DIY Sheep versus Doctor Who and everybody else

Chris sounds exactly like that guy in the wheel chair off Little Britain














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The Ubiquitous Review Guide: Rose

 

It was ..............

 

A: fantastic

B: total shyte.

 

I don’t think the new series ..........

 

A: is anything like the old one

B: will scare the kiddies that much, but by gum Mickey’s acting had me horrified

C: is anything like Buffy.

 

I never realized Christopher Eccleston’s nose was ..........

 

A: so handsome

B: effing huge

C: can be seen from outer space on a clear day

 

I think he will make Doctor Who fans ..........

 

A: very happy once they have all calmed down a bit and stopped hitting themselves on the head with bricks

B: sob uncontrollably because they didn’t bring back Paul McGann

C: kick their television screens in.

 

I think Paul McGann is ...........

 

A: dead sexy

B: dead sexy

C: dead sexy.

 

It was a bit of a pity that Chris will not do another season. He is ..........

 

A: a talented actor who obviously values his career

B: a total shit

C: a dead man.

 

I ..........

 

A: totally respect his decision

B: have already put out a contract on him.

 

Billie Piper deeply moved me ..........

 

A: to throw up

B: as it reminded me of an unforgettable night spent with a Swedish lap dancer called Inga

C: in ways that it just would not be polite to go into.

 

She really does look ..........

 

A: like a slapper

B: dead phoarr making in that pink polar fleecie

C: remarkably like a blow up doll.

 

I think she and the Doctor ...........

 

A: will have a great time together fighting wrongs all over the galaxy

B: will shag like rabbits.

 

My, the new TARDIS interior is ...........

 

A: very innovative

B: intestinal

C: cod awful.

 

They must have spent ...........

 

A: months

B: weeks

C: days

D: at least half an hour nicking stuff from the Outpost Gallifrey Braxatiel forum

 

.....designing that one.

 

However, no matter what I am ...........

 

A: just glad it is back

B: going to lock myself in my room and re read all the New Adventures

C: going to gouge my eyes out with a spoon in honour of Sylvester McCoy.