DIY Sheep versus Doctor Who and everybody else

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More exciting fan fiction, featuring fearless physicians who fights fiends.
Bring on the cattle prods. It's angst time with Doctor Eight. I mean who doesn't like the idea of poking Paul McGann (or Hugh Laurie) with sharp sticks?

Doctor Who

Half Human on His Mother's Side

Lungbarrow meets the TV movie. The journal of an old Time Lord. Totally sappy, involves two Doctors and an awful amount of fan wank.


Poking the Eighth Doctor with cattle prods. Move over Kate Orman.

A Broken Wheel

Hands up who has read Lungbarrow? A 'oh just sod off and die canon' story involving the Seventh Doctor, Ace, the Master, the Minister and some horrible Time Lords.

A Time Lord Even More So

A long sappy story involving two Doctors (Seven and Eight), some fan fiction shaggin action, President 'superbitch' Romana and an inordinate amount of rocks.

Girlie Ace/Doc vingette
I can't help myself - I am such a big girlie sheep

hello Mary Sue

Horatio Hornblower


An unbelievably long and sappy story (with the plot ripped off from the Cout of Monte Cristo). But if you like angst, violence and happy endings - this one is for you.

House MD


The Contract

What happens when House pisses off the wrong person? The usual - long, violent, sappy...

Schoolboys in Da House

House and Wilson get in trouble

Jimmy the Wonder Boy Oncologist and Dr Scruffy McCane

Making the world safe for kittens up trees everywhere...


House's house

I don't know if you watch House, but if you do you will notice certain TARDIS like abilities when it comes to his house (by that I mean the place where he lives). So I thought... well... why not...

House's Hospital

Princeton Plainsborough Teaching Hospital - home of the mysterious appearing balconies...

House's Piano

You can so see where this is going can't you?

Bad bad boys

House continues to get into trouble with the relentless Doctor Cuddy, but will he have Wilson to back him up this time?

Dream Jimmy

House loves Wilson and Wilson loves House (but not in a man on man hot sex shaggin action type of way)

The strangest notions would make sense to him and he would spare no expense in testing his theories. Indeed I heard the resulting crash from three floor above...

Drox knew nothing of overkill, literary criticism or The Times newspaper...

Nothing like a bit of fan wank now and then...

Harold's mighty army went out to fulfill their quest. They travelled the galaxies, they squirmed through black holes, they read books at the local library and attended a rather dull lecture series about 13th century vases...
When they had explored every bit of the universe they could lay their hands on they built time machines to explore every backward and forward bit of time.
And finally they returned with their prize.
It was a short skinny scuffy looking chap with curly hair, crooked fingers and pale blue eyes.

To the TARDIS there were only two types of being. Those who spent far too long in the bathroom and those who should spend a little more time in the bathroom (and improve their aim).

I think, in the general cosmic scheme, things have a way of sorting themselves out.

She marched and grabbed the offending miscreant by the ear. House made a noise that could only be described as an 'erp', but helplessly followed the pull on his ear.

House as an egg
No - I didn't do it

Agony and wood were all he was aware of. He imagined the pain throbbing through his body was making the wooden floorboards vibrate. He laughed silently and hysterically: He was a human piano of pain. House the human piano of pain. It had a nice ring to it… which reminded him: pianos don’t sound like bells.


Pianos sound woody, not bingy. Where were the bells coming from? The bells of St Clemens. Saint Wilson probably. Wondering why he wasn’t there to make with the oranges and lemons. He gingerly opened an eye, found himself eyeballing a dusty floor board and make a random mental note to bark at the cleaning lady. He watched disinterestedly as his breath moved the dust back and forth. It was daylight. He realised he was probably late for work, the bell was Wilson ringing him on the phone, and that he had better cover himself before anybody found out what sort of tune this human piano was playing.


He had always hated the funeral march.

‘Oh - House.’


Both men froze in their tracks at her tone. House turned slowly around to see her pointing at the ground in front of her. Like a puppy who knows it is going to get whapped on the nose with a rolled up newspaper, he very slowly limped back to Cuddy, his leg dragging behind him and his head down.


He stopped before her and looked up at her with his best soulful and expectant look.


‘Oh cut that out,’ she snapped.


House deflated. ‘How many more,’ he asked.


‘Another six I think.’






‘Yes,’ he said with a sigh.


‘Yes what?’


‘Yes M’am.’ This time it was more of a mumble.


Cuddy smirked. ‘You may go.’

I think I am so dead sexy

As Paul likes to say: 'the world's my library, but I have lost my library card. Fortunately the librarians were most accomodating.'

The 'Are You Paul McGann' test:
  1. Do people often call you Paul or Mr McGann?
  2. Do people sometimes come up and say how much they enjoyed Withnail and I?
  3. Have you ever played Doctor Who?
If you answered yes, no or maybe to these questions - you could be Paul McGann!

If you like fan fiction just clicky clicky on this link and let your host DIY Sheep (the sheep to the stars) take you on a whirlwind tour of the best of the best of the best of Doctor Who fan fiction on the net with the Fan Fiction Oscars.