DIY Sheep versus Doctor Who and everybody else

the dead doctor sketch














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When the new series was announced there was much speculation regarding the new Doctor. Would they get someone totally unexpected like that guy from Craker. Would it be that bloke from Jonathon Creek? Would it be Richard E Grant? Would they ask Mr McGann back..?
 
And so we have The Dead Doctor Sketch
 
by Someone
















MR PRALINE: 'Now thats what I call a dead Doctor'

SHOPKEEPER: 'No, no, its stunned'

MR PRALINE: 'Now look my lad, I've had just about enough of this, that Doctor is definitely deceased, and when I saw that film not nine years ago you assured me that its lack of series was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squawk'

SHOPKEEPER: 'He's pining for the quarries!'

MR PRALINE: 'Pining for the quarries? What kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat in its back the moment it was aired in America?'

SHOPKEEPER: 'The McGann Doctor prefers kipping on its back, beautiful actor, lovely wig...'

MR PRALINE: 'I took the liberty of examining that Doctor, and I discovered that the only reason it was in the TARDIS in the first place was that it had been nailed there,'

SHOPKEEPER: 'Well of course it was nailed there otherwise it would have muscled up to those doors and VOOM!'

MR PRALINE: 'Look matey, this Doctor wouldn't 'voom' if I put spectrox in it, its bleedin' demised'

SHOPKEEPER: 'Its not! Its pining...'

MR PRALINE: 'Its not pining, its passed on, this Doctor is no more, it has ceased to be, its expired and gone to meet Rassilon, this is a late Doctor! It’s a stiff! Bereft of ratings it rests in peace, if you hadn't nailed it to the books it would be pushing up the daisies, its wound down the curtain and joined the choir invisible! This, is an ex Doctor!'
















This was something I nicked off a forum. I have never been able to trace the owner of it, but I liked it so much (and technically it is totally nicked from Monty Python) I thought it needed an airing.